Jacinda's Birthday is Tomorrow .... Bittersweet

So Jacinda's 2nd birthday is tomorrow. It's great ... we've been home from China with her since the end of October. There was a time when we weren't sure if she'd be home before her birthday. So we're really excited that she's home and doing so well.

But. I can't help but think about her first mom. Was she excited to be having a baby? How did she feel when the baby was a girl AND had a cleft lip and palate? Did she immediately know that they would give up the baby? How did it feel to leave the baby outside, in front of an orphanage? I'm so glad DD was left somewhere that she'd be found quickly. She was dressed in a coat and wrapped up in blankets. Obviously, someone took good care of her.

How does Jacinda's first mom feel every day, but especially on her birthday? I'm so sad that DD's first mom will never be able to see her grow up, or see her sweet, crooked smile, or get kisses from her. But on the other hand, we get to experience all of that. It's such a strange, bittersweet feeling.

I haven't thought much about Jacinda's first mom until now. I can't imagine leaving my baby and never knowing what happened to her. I am so grateful that God thought we were the right parents for this precious, sweet little girl.